pahavit (pahavit) wrote,

The Would-Be Intruder

The Would-Be Intruder

Early this afternoon I was sitting in bed, not feeling very well. I thought I heard faint knocking on my apartment door, but I wasn't sure. I was too busy looking at snails on the Internet; far more interesting than hauling my aching bones out of bed to see what one of my neighbors wanted.

Then I heard it again --- faint knocking. My dipstick downstairs neighbor will knock lightly on my door every once in a blue moon for some utterly lame reason, and I was just not in the mood to deal with him, so I tried to ignore it hoping he'd think I wasn't home, and go away.

After a moment I thought I heard other noises at the door. I got up to investigate, but I did not recognize the guy through the peephole. The little button on the doorknob was moving a bit, and it sounded like he was trying to use a key but it didn't fit in the lock. I looked through the peephole again, and that's when I saw an enormous brown eye right up against it looking right back inside at me!

Holy frijole!! There I was, eyeball to eyeball with goodness knows who!

Whoever it was took off immediately, because after a few moments of silence and deciding what to do, when I looked through the peephole again he was gone.

Shortly after that another tenant and I went through the whole building together, roof to basement, to see if he might be hanging around somewhere on the premises. We didn't find a soul. For this reconnaissance tour I decided to improvise arming myself with a lemon reamer.   You may laugh at this, but think about it --- a hard, pointed object rammed suddenly into one of your soft, vulnerable regions, and you're down for the count long enough for the cops to show up and haul your ass to the slammer. After all, no one ever expects to get a lemon reamer thrust in their eye, throat, solar plexus, etc. I figured in a pinch it'd do. At any rate, I did not need to put it to use.

The other tenant also asked at the corner market if they'd seen anyone matching the guy's description come in that day, and they said no.

I also spoke with the local police station, and they said they did not have any reports of intruders recently on my block, but told me to call 911 right away if it ever happened again.

I wasn't scared at all during all of this, oddly. Usually my nerves are hypersensitive, but today I was cool as a cucumber. I was ready to club the guy with a frying pan if he got in, but I wasn't scared. One of the weird advantages to having CFIDS/ME --- I just didn't have the energy to get scared.

Tags: break-in, intruder

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