The Dream of Bog Toads (from 2009)
The Dream of Bog Toads
There was a strange thing coming out of the back of my hand -- a hairy larva thing poking out of a pore. I tried to find a chopstick to wrap the end of the larva around to pull it out, but I needed help. I asked Bill Clinton (who was a doctor) to help pull it out, but he was too busy. I asked Michelle Obama (she and Bill Clinton and I were all living in the White House), but she was busy too.
The thing turned into a wart-like swelling that grew until it burst, releasing a tiny toad-like creature. Just before it burst open I could see its tiny hind legs in silhouette through my skin. It popped out painlessly, and immediately plumped up to the size of a small walnut. There was no blood. I caught it and covered it up in a cup to identify later.
Someone figured out a code phrase to let Michelle Obama know it was important to come and assist me. Before she showed up, 2 more popped out of my hand. I caught them both but one got away before I could corral it in a container. Someone said they were bog toads and had a very strange physiology that they could live inside me and pop out without any pain and hardly any sensation at all.
There was a strange thing coming out of the back of my hand -- a hairy larva thing poking out of a pore. I tried to find a chopstick to wrap the end of the larva around to pull it out, but I needed help. I asked Bill Clinton (who was a doctor) to help pull it out, but he was too busy. I asked Michelle Obama (she and Bill Clinton and I were all living in the White House), but she was busy too.
The thing turned into a wart-like swelling that grew until it burst, releasing a tiny toad-like creature. Just before it burst open I could see its tiny hind legs in silhouette through my skin. It popped out painlessly, and immediately plumped up to the size of a small walnut. There was no blood. I caught it and covered it up in a cup to identify later.
Someone figured out a code phrase to let Michelle Obama know it was important to come and assist me. Before she showed up, 2 more popped out of my hand. I caught them both but one got away before I could corral it in a container. Someone said they were bog toads and had a very strange physiology that they could live inside me and pop out without any pain and hardly any sensation at all.